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Mac: Desert Skies FMMMMM

Tendy: Greetings, Travelers! It’s been one remarkably beautiful and incredibly long lasting night here on the Desert Sphere. I’m the Attendant, chief operator of the Desert Skies Astral Plane Fuel and Service Station, and I’m joined by my associate and dearest friend, the Mechanic.

Mac: I’m your dearest friend?

Tendy: Of course.

Mac: Ya hear that, traveler? I’m someone’s dearest friend.

Tendy: And possibly smelliest. How much jerky did you eat today?

Mac: Just all of it.

Tendy: Is it funny that I still manage to worry about your health in spite of the obvious?

Mac: It is funny, but also says something about your nurturing nature.

Tendy: Traveler, you are on your way to the next life. The drive is beautiful, the sights unmatched, and the road is paved to perfection. But even the most breathtaking and wonderful adventures can still be fraught with dangers when the appropriate measures are not taken.

Mac: So listen up!

Tendy: Whoa there, Mac. No need to go drill sergeant on us. Have you been drinking Tera-Seraphic soda again?

Mac: I can stop anytime I want to

Tendy: We’ll see. So Traveler, as I was saying, stay informed less you find yourself in an unpleasant situation. Here’s today’s safe travel tip

Mac: Safe travel tip for travelers on the Astral Plane

Tendy: Sphere movers. Who are they? What are they? What do they do?

So far, what we know is Sphere Movers are extreeeemly powerful celestial beings. In fact, to the best of our knowledge, the most powerful beings there are. But traveler, not all of them have your best interests at heart. You simply must be on guard.

While our maps provide us with lots of useful information for the journey, what they don’t tell us is the identity and classification of each sphere’s designated mover.

Mac: If I may interject. We do know the identity of one Sphere Mover. His name is Corson, and he tried to enslave me after I lost some games to him. When we first met, I would have said he’s malevolent, but now…

Tendy: Now, I wouldn’t know how to classify him either. Heeee’s….

Mac: A mystery

Tendy: A mystery. Good way to put it. Next up, what is it that Sphere Movers actually do? Well, we don’t exactly know that either. I mean, we assume they move their sphere. What that means is a little lost on us. What we do know is that they rule over their sphere, the big bosses of their respective homes.

Mac: Big bosses. I like that. Tendy, may I ask a question good sir?

Tendy: Be my guest.

Mac: We’re here on the Desert Sphere.

Tendy: That’s correct.

Mac: Then who’s our mover?

Tendy: Oh, that is, something I don’t think I’ve ever thought about. I guess it makes sense that we would have one. Maybe it’s you?

Mac: <Chuckle> That would explain my remarkable strength.

Tendy: And your ability to drink your weight in tera-seraphic soda in one sitting.

In closing, the most important thing to remember about Sphere Movers is this. They’re extremely powerful, possibly powerful enough to remove you from existence itself, and it’s not worth the risk trying to get to know them. As we always say: they may look evil, friendly, or sad, not worth the risk, assume they’re all bad.

Mac: I will do what it says because it rhymes.

And now dear traveler, it’s time for a segment called rest your weary soul. REST YOUR WEEEAARY SOUUUUUL

As you travel the Astral Highway, you will have more than enough time to reflect on your life on the physical plane. As we’ve discussed before, many of the memories you have of that life may be tied to painful and sad experiences.
So as you’re driving along you may find yourself ruminating on these thoughts. Without the plethora of distractions that were available to you on the physical plane, things like your Atari 7800 or your 8-track player, it’s hard not to think about the Physical Plane.

What do we do with the emotions tied to these memories? Well, it depends on you and your unique talents, but as I learned from a friend I met recently, one of the best ways you can work through these feelings is by writing a song.

Don’t worry too much about how the song will sound to others. When you’re in that Skylark there’s no need to create something perfect that will suit the desires of an audience. It’s just you and the open road. So don’t try to make it amazing, just try to make it honest.

I think there’s something a little magic about the way feelings expressed through words pair so well with a tune, don’t you? It takes the thoughts that are so deeply buried in our mind, brings them out into the light, and wraps them up in a song. And so the thing inside of us that we couldn’t control, is now a thing outside of us that we can control. We can sing it faster, or slower, we can sing it angry, or with an air of melancholy, or in a different language. It’s ours to do with as we wish.

I hope you find a time to maybe write a little song about something that’s been rattling around in your brain for too long, and in doing so, find a little rest for your weary soul.

Tendy: I can’t wait for you to learn how to play that guitar, Mac

And now to those who are freshly arriving from the Physical Plane. You’re probably a little confused right now. Don’t worry. All will be explained when you arrive at Desert Skies Astral Plane Fuel and Service Station

Where we have allll your road trip favorites

We have those little packs of donuts that we all love despite the fact that neither their flavor or texture resembles anything like a real donut. These delicious little imposters come in chocolate and powdered sugar flavor. Worried about that powdered sugar destroying your favorite shirt? We’ve got disposable bibs with the Desert Skies logo on them.

Mac: I almost never take mine off
Tendy: And, don’t forget to check out some of our prepackaged sandwiches, the bread is never soggy but the meat is almost always a mystery.

And that’s our broadcast traveler. Safe travels!